Tommy Boy starring Chris Farley and David Spade - Movie Quotes

Tommy Boy is hands down the best movie with the Chris Farley and David Spade duo. I can never get enough of this movie.

Richard, who is your favorite little rascal? Alphalfa or Spanky? Sinner
Does this suit make me look fat? No, no your face does
Well you can get a good look at a T-Bone by sticking your head up a bulls ass but wouldn’t you rather take the butchers word for it?
Kid in Bank: Hey, Mom! It’s the guy who robbed the bank.
Tommy: I didn’t rob any bank.
Kid in Bank: Oh, yeah, right. Like it was some other real fat guy with a tiny head.
Tommy: I got a tiny head?
I have what doctors call a little bit of a weight problem.
Brothers don’t shake hands…brothers gotta hug!!!
Holy Shnikeys!!!!
I used to get bear claws lodged, two at a time, right here! (Ahhh, my little sister does this line spot on. She even pounds on her chest trying to dislodge the claws!)
Fat Guy in a little coat…Fat Guy in a little coat…
Housekeeping, you want me jack you off?
Richard! Were you watching, “Spank-tra-vision?” Maybe you were watching a movie with that funny comedian! Oh, whats his name? Buddy… Whackett?
Oh, I’ve interrupted happy time! Now I know you want to sit there and keep being not slim, but we gotta work a little today
No offense, but if I showed a picture of your mom to some of my buddies at school, she’d definitely be “Boner of the Month”
Richard Hayden: I need your John Hancock.
Tommy: It’s HERBIE Hancock
Did you eat a lot of paint chips when you were a kid?
Tommy: Did you hear I finally graduated?
Richard Hayden: Yeah, and just a shade under a decade too, all right.
Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard Hayden: I know, they’re called doctors